to hell with white christmases!

Guess who went swimming two days after christmas!! ME.
Then the temperature dropped to a record low!! 59 degrees!
(Actually, that was kinda bad because I only brought one thin jacket and one quarter sleeve shirt...)

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

near the end

I got a paper cut on my lip. From licking an envelop shut. I like the envelops with the adhesive tape that you just remove the back and stick down... My stamps are like that.
I ran a bunch of errands today and I still feel like I have a ton of shit to do. I just want to be gone and not have to worry about this stuff. But the problem is, I havn't prepared for my trip well either, because I am going to be in Merida in less than a week and I still am not entirely sure where I'm staying. Maybe I should get a phone card. Or maybe I should just show up.. :)

Gotta go. I have a date today. Right now. With Karyn Zuidhof. My roommate from freshmen year.

Peace, love, harmony, and all those good things.

happy in the sun

I went to the business office to hand in a paper for NSPICE stuff and Karen asked me if I got her email. I said "no, what email?" And she said about the cost of NSPICE, and then said "oh, that's someone else..." But then she said she did have the figures of what NSPICE will cost and what I will owe, if I would just wait for her to calculate it all. So I said fine. She calculated the numbers and said "You'll owe about $100 for next semester." And then "Oh wait, you paid a deposit already" a little more calculating and then the magic words "Dordt will owe you $200 next semester." HOORAY!! So I started walking back to my room and I was so excited I had to tell someone, so I called my mother. While on the phone with mom, I saw this guy up ahead with longish blondish hair and I thought "I don't remember seeing the back of that head here before" and the guy turned around and - Hey, it's Jeff Schutter!! So I said "Mom, I have to call you back later." She said "call me tomorrow". So I said hi to Jeff and talked for a while in the middle of the sidewalk - it's a lovely day today. Sunny. And now I'm all excited and don't know what to do with myself!
Maybe I'll go make some lupper and then go buy a sinterklas present for someone I don't know and then babysit for the Hendersons.
Have an enjoyable weekend!

ps - thanks for the comments on the last post. I don't really know what that was all about, but I enjoyed the comments. :)

to make it through

Today I took a client to HyVee to do his shopping and I waited in the van for him so I had nothing to do and no good radio station and was left alone with my thoughts. And I started thinking about the things I think about when I have time to think. I wondered if I ever think of important things, or if I spend all my thinking time thinking about homework, or random, mindless, unimportant, stupid things like how my nails need clipping or how delicious the mint chocolate milk was. How come I never have deep theological or philosophical discussions with myself in my head? Why don't I even just think about what is going on in my life or things I'm struggling with. Why don't I think of other people and how they might be doing at that particular moment in time? I guess my thoughts aren't always nonserious, but I think a lot of times I distract myself from the more serious topics because part of me doesn't want to deal with that stuff.
I should be sleeping right now, but I decided to stay up all night tonight to write my speech for friday, just in case it doesn't get completely done, I still actually have all day tomorrow to finish it. (This is a first.)

no muziek today.

I fell asleep on my couch last night.
I have a cold, so word of advice - if I don't like you, steer clear of the bean on saturday or I might put a secret ingredient in your drink. In fact, just to be sure, ask for a "clean" drink.
Eggnog season should start earlier and end later.
I won't be getting christmas gifts this year.
I don't have to buy christmas gifts this year.
I get to celebrate christmas with my old church.
I got five CD's in the mail yesterday.
I need to buy some spijkerbroek. (?)
I wonder if Sue from the costume shop would patch up my jeans. Does she even work there anymore?
Except for this line and the one about eggnog, every line in this post started with I.
I'm need to finish writing my paper now.

she can't let go and she can't relax.

My bank account and I have a love-hate relationship right now.
But then, who doesn't have that?

I have so much homework, I don't even know where to begin. Perhaps the test I have tomorrow wouldn't be a bad place to start?

I'm going to start packing soon. :)

Black bean soup is on the menu for the weekend. Sunday maybe. Anyone want to come over and help eat it?

And it breaks my heart.

I'm in GR now. :) I missed Yoli. I think we've become better friends since I've left for college. (Ironic, no?) But even especially since leaving Mexico, which could be from not having to share a room anymore... Whatever the reason, though, I love it. I love that we get along so well now. I love that I can be such good friends with my siblings. Because even when all other friends fail to keep in touch, or I fail to keep in touch with friends, my sisters (and brother) and I will always keep in touch (I HOPE!!) and will always be friends (I REALLY HOPE!!!!!!).
So thats all I got for today. Nice and cheesy I know. :)
And I hope you don't like it.

A distant ship's smoke on the horizon

I've recently discovered that many of my roommates share my liking of raquetball! I love raquetball, but never knew who to play with, but now that I know my roommies like playing I'm going to take advantage and play a lot before the end of the semester! Conveniantly one of my roommies also works at the rec center and can get us raquets for free (because you have to pay to use them now, how shitty is that?). Today some of us played doubles. It was crazy because it's hard to stay out of the way, and you have to remember when it's your turn to hit the ball because you HAVE to alternate between you and your teammate. I love the game so much I went crazy and was even diving for balls - which actually worked at times too! I also have a welt on my left inner thigh from getting pelted with the ball by some guy friend of my roommies who was playing with us and being an idiot. But I still think raquetball is becoming a favorite sport of mine.
I decided to write my persuasive speech on why people should vote.

New favorite song of mine - Comfortably Numb by Pink Floyd.

Uh, this is the Cottonmouth and negatory on the cost o' this mo-chine there, red rider.

I have my crazy Sunday this week. Every other week I work a double shift on Sunday, from 3pm to 7am Monday, which makes it incredibly tempting to just sleep Sunday morning away because I know I won't be sleeping much that night. Especially since I keep letting my homework build up so I end up doing it all Sunday night at work. At least I have food to bring along today. I went to the cheesecake factory on Friday and brought most of my dinner home in a box. Now I can take it to work. Hooray for doggy bags!
Yesterday Rachel and I (but mostly Rachel) made some bars and snow balls, which are basically like oliebollen, only easier and quicker to make, and also more fluffy I think. Anyway, then we invited around 30 people over (they didn't all come at once, and there may not have actually been thirty, but there may have been...) and it was a great time! Seniors, freshmen, and the inbetweeners, and Rachel's grandparents all brought together by food like true Americans. (hm?)
Watched NCDC last night. How long will it take people (performers) to realize we don't watch NCDC to see pretty faces and hear good voices, we go to see a show?! It seems the girls just try to look pretty and show off their lovely voices to sentimental love songs. The guys typically do a better job of performance because looks just won't get them as far. Becca Oudmen was by far the best chic up there (but then I am kind of biased). She picked a good song, not so popular, that I thought had a decent range to it AND she has a good voice. She just needs to work on stage presence! But Shafstall was the best, in my opinion. Fun song (by the killers) and he really played off the audience and went all into it, but almost jokingly. And there was a guy from Northwestern (Matt Deglopper) who was really fun too - he had his own guitarist (possibly Zac Couture?) backstage playing for him, and he sang "Hit me baby one more time" by BS. Takes a lot of guts, if you ask me. But what I liked was he didn't sing it in a mocking voice, he actually did it kind of seriously, but with appropriate facial and body expression. I think NCDC is really between Shaft and Deglopper. They were FUN to watch!!!

P.S. THIS made MY day!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pv5zWaTEVkI

there's a destination a little up the road

Thanks for the advice. I've made up my mind to go to Grand Rapids. In fact, I've even found a ride already. So Grand Rapids here I come! - Be prepared! But to all those of you who have forgotten - my parents are in Texas now so going to Michigan does not mean seeing my family, it just means seeing a member of my family - Yolanda. Going to Texas to see my family - mom, dad, brother, and two youngest sisters - was not even an option because nobody at Dordt is from anywhere near El Paso so finding an affordable way there is pretty much impossible. But it's all decided now. Yoli said she is a bit lonely now that the family is gone, so I'm gonna see her, even though I'll see her over Christmas break as well.
Why is the last half of the semester always worse than the first? Why do bosses choose to fire full time employees who really weren't that bad of workers when we're already understaffed? And then how does this boss expect everyone else to fill in the newly uncovered shifts as if people don't have families, kids, other jobs, homework, tests, and lives outside of work that also need our attention and time? Why is communication with some people so difficult while with others so easy? Why do I blog when I should be studying for the two tests I have in the next couple days?

Mama said.

I went to the mall on thursday to get my drivers license updated, but turns out the DL booth is only there on tuesdays and wednesdays. But since that day was so damn cold, and since I was in the mall anyway, I went to the sports store and bought those track pants my roommate kept telling me were so nice and warm. And I like them. Which is good because they weren't cheap. They are smooth and fit so nice under jeans.
Yesterday I worked at Hope Haven from 7am to 3pm. It was so slow I had to knit to keep from falling asleep. Then I went home and since it was warm I went rollarblading. Then I ate lupper and then took a nap. For 2 hours. Then I worked at the bean at 8pm. At first no one was there, but then the Mark Schultz (or whatever) concert got out and Mark himself came with his friends to the bean, along with a million other people and a band, but I don't know who the band was. And everyone ordered drinks! Which was good and bad.
Good = the bean made a lot of money. I think.
Bad = I was BOGGED!!!!
Good = I made over $8 in tips.
Bad = And then there was comedy league and MORE POEPLE!!
Good = Chris Kuiper was around afterwards (because he kind of runs comedy league with Shaffstal) and he was nice enough to come help me for a few minutes so I could get on top of everything.
Bad = when everyone left at midnight it took me over an hour to clean the whole place up.
Good = there was leftover coffee in the coffeepot which I brought home, so after church this morning I had some cool people over for coffee and it was great!

what should I do for thanksgiving? Go to Grand Rapids to see Yolanda, my sister? Or go to Alberta and try to see Justine, and explain to my mom why I can afford to drive 20 hrs north, but not 20 south...?

you make me happy, oh when skies are grey

I walked into chorale today to see Walhof completely shirtless. HOT.
Costume parties are fun when people actually have good costumes. But so many of them seem to be about how slutty the girls can get away with being. I think girls use holloween as an excuse to dress like a whore without being labelled as one. Almost more so for Christian girls. It's the one time (besides when in swimsuits) they can go out in public and show off their hot, or not-so-hot, bodies and try to impress the boys. GROSS.
But then I see some costumes which make me jealous of the creativity of some people, but mostly just make me laugh, thereby making me a bit happier. HOORAY.
My freshmen-year-roommate just called and wants to have sleep-over. DOUBLE HOORAY.

na na na na. na na na na.

I was talking to my roommate today in the TV room and this commercial came on. The commercial goes something like this - there's a guy who sees a spider and gets it to crawl onto a paper or something and he releases it outside. There is another bug that he also lets go free or something. Then he grabs a kleenex and blows his nose as the narrator says something about the kleenex killing up to 90-some% of germs and the guy kinda stops what he's doing for a sec, then sorta shrugs it off as narrator says thank heavens for forgiveness, thank heavens there's this brand of kleenex... (I forget the brand and the exact words, but you get the picture..) Anyway, so I see this and say to Rachel "Thank heavens for forgiveness? what does that have to do with anything?" I was thinking this commercial is stupid and doesn't make sense. Then Rachel (who's a major is ag-missions) explains to me about some religion that believes killing anything is wrong and will even filter water so as not to drink anything living, etc... And still I'm thinking, so what's the connection? And then "click" - I get it. The germs. Kleenex KILLS the germs. Need forgiveness! and all of a sudden this "stupid" add becomes genius.
So now that I feel like an idiot, I shall do some boasting to gratify my ego. I have a theology test tomorrow so I went to my prof today to ask a few questions and organize some thoughts. One of the first things my prof said to me when I walked in was that he liked my reading-responses. Then he asked what my major was, and then he tried to convince me to be a theology major, or at least a minor, but finally settled on "at least take some more theology classes" and he hauled out his catalog and looked through to find some missions related courses (since I'd expressed interest in missions). Though I have no intention of being a theology major/minor, I must say I am extremely flattered that this particular prof was trying to persuade me to do so.

Okay, so really perhaps writing this is an arrogant thing to do, but I was just really excited to hear this because I do sort of struggle with self-confidence a bit - as in not always having enough. So I need to be reassured at times that in some way or other I am special or smart or have done something worth doing or thought something worth thinking - not just from biased people like family or even friends, but from someone who has a not-so-personal relationship with me and speaks just from "evidence" or concrete things... you know?
I'm out.

Peace.

iiiiii don't wanna work.

Talk about a week full of surprises. First, surprise! - I forgot to work in the bean in the afternoon (pulls at shirt collar) so I worked a while in the evening instead. Karaoke was going on outside... it was great.. riiiight. Then at some point I looked up from making a drink and out of the corner of my eye I saw someone and thought to myself, "wow, she looks like Ann Andree. And then I looked again and was like, "IT IS ANN ANDREE!" It was great to see you again, Ann! Laura too! And deGroot came out the saturday before and stayed a whole week. Twas a great week/weekend full of awsome people.
Brielle, I miss your costume parties. I dressed up yesterday (I was the monopoly guy but everyone thought I was some old actor named Charlie someone or other) and went to doc's. There was a dance in the back, but I just sat in the front with a bunch of friends and observed all the crazy, good, stupid, or slutty costumes. It just didn't compare to costume parties with good food and good drinks and good people with good costumes.
anyway, I got a phone call sometime yesterday from my grandma saying she and gramps were taking a trailer from Indiana to South Dakota and wanted to stop by!! So today I went out to eath with them and then we went hot tubbing for half an hour because Gramps has a cold and his voice left nearly left him and Grams thinks hot tubbing will help. Gramps started telling me how after he graduated from college, he couldn't go to grad school right away so he got drafted. In his hoarse voice he told me that in the morning they had to do a role call and if the boys didn't answer loud enough his drill sargent would yell "Say it like you got a pair!" and Grandpa turned all red and Grams made sure she pointed it out. :) They are so cute! I'm glad they came by.

I'm going on NSPICE, baby, yeah!!!

good night, dear void.

This week has probably been the worst of the semester. I worked the overnight Sunday so I started off being tired and not feeling caught up on homework. Then I had three tests, which oddly enough, the one that I studied least for seemed to go the best, and the one I studied most for went the worst. (Should I quit studying?) And then I had to say goodbye sort of unexpectedly to a good friend. And I started (again) thinking of all the people I miss and have not seen in months or years. Saturday I have to work at 8:20 am. :(

But there have been and will be some positive things as well.
I've recently been introduced to Rufus Wainwright. I like him. And I like friends who introduce me to good music. My favorite songs of his? - Beauty Mark and Matinee Idol.
Also, deGroot is coming saturday. HOORAY! Anyone interested in going to Sioux Falls on saturday night to pick him up and hang out?
I think my room had a bit of a break through today. We had a nice long chat about unimportant things and important things. Not like conflict resolution or anything, because there isn't much conflict, but just a heart-to-heartish type chat that made me, at least, feel closer to everyone. Twas nice.
I'm eating Dove's unconditional chocolate ice cream!
And hey, I'm twenty one. ;)

This one is for Amanda

I forgot about this until I read your blog and you asked if you are the only one with so many spider experiences...

After my first shift at the bean on Tuesday I went out to my bike (or actually Dane's bike...) and started unlocking it. After wrapping my arms under and around the handels to get to the lock, I realized I had just put my arms and almost my face in a mass of spider webs full of little baby spiders! My first thought was "sick!" but my second was "I wish Amanda was me right now, and I was watching from a couple feet away." I shuddered, finished unlocking the bike while trying to keep my face a safe distance away, and started going home. I pretended I didn't care about the little spiders, squishing the ones I saw on my arms, but as I kept biking I saw three, then four, spiders dangling from the handlebars. The wind was blowing them towards me. So I got off the bike by the BJ and grabbed a long wood chip/strip using it to wipe up the remainder of the web and hopefully the little spiders with it. I found more web by the chain, under the seat, in the tires... The whole bike was basically one giant mass of spider web with itsy bitsy spiders everywhere! I was a bit grossed out, but after wiping up what I could see, I got back on the bike and rode to a Canadian Thanksgiving dinner at A2. Who knows, I may have eaten a spider or two...

ransom notes keep falling out your mouth

I've never been so obsessed and only once been so moved by a song as I have been lately by Hide and Seek by Imogen Heap. I've never had a favorite song until now. This has got to be the most lovely song I ever heard! I listened to it at least 10 times yesterday and 5 more today.
I talked to Amanda and my younger sister Yolanda this week and I've never missed them more.
The RA class (which is in the bean every tuesday when I work) was talking about illegal hispanic imigrants and I've never been pissed off more. Well, maybe thats not true, but hearing certain opinions was pretty upsetting. Sometimes I wish I didn't know what some people really think.
Last night was one of the worst sleeps ever. I think I layed in bed around two hours or longer before actually falling asleep. My mind just wouldn't shut up!
I've been realizing more and more how guarded I am. My most honest moments seem to be when I've had a few to drink...

(My posts lately seem to be random thoughts that don't tie together. oh well.)

time's just gonna change itself around

Amanda called today!
I'm listening to zero 7 right now and loving it.
Rainy days are great. (Just not too many in a row.)
The back of my hair needs cutting. It's growing into a mullet. :S
Ross should go on NSPICE.

I don't have to speak

Breaks are great.
Birthdays are great.
Parties are great.
This weekend was great.

neverland

Yesterday I went ice skating with Rose, Sabina (I don't know how it's spelled), and Inge Henderson. It was fun.
Today my arms are sore from holding Rose up while skating.
I went to the Henderson's house today to play dutch memory. Rose and Sabine traced my hands on paper and then drew rings and bracelets on them. I hung these on my fridge. Rose said I am her favorite babysitter, but I am only the second favorite of Sabinuh. ;) Then we walked to campus and I showed them my apartment. (and I walked in on Raquel making me surprise cupcakes for my birthday - oops!) Then I walked them home. In their yard they decided they needed to burry me in their pile of leaves. Sabeena said to lay still and when Inge was right next to her she would say go and then I was to jump up and scare her. So they called Inge out and asked her where I was and she played along and looked for me. Then Subeena said "GO" and I jumped and "scared" Inge! I miss being little. I love those girls!

how long?

New CD's = AWSOME!
I have a theology test tomorrow. I am not done studying yet, but I don't know how I'm supposed to remember how Anselm and especially Thomas Aquinas tried to prove God's existence, on top of many other ideas and such. I can never remember who said what.. oh well. Don't sweat it, Carmela. (I keep telling myself that.)
Today was nice for a little while. It was sunny. But then the sun hid its face and now the outdoors are cool. no, cold.
I got everything handed in that needs to be for my NSPICE application, except three small photos of myself. I have until 10 Oktober.
Amanda called today and caught me just as I was about to walk out the door and go to class. I skipped class. :) It was good to hear her voice again and talk about nothing. I miss her. Soon after, I got a call from my brother telling me that our good friend Leydi from Xoy had a baby girl! I don't know the name or how long ago this girl was born, but I was very excited when I heard this! And to think I will get to see this girl in December when I go to Merida! HOORAY! Today was a good day.
But I also started thinking of all the people I miss and wish I could see again soon. or ever.

all I really want to say

I am catching a cold.
I went line dancing yesterday.
This week is busy. I work this afternoon and night at the bean. Tomorrow I work at Hope Haven. Saturday and twice on Sunday I work at Hope Haven too. Long week.
I have a theology test on friday.
Sharing text books is cheap, but it is also inconveniant.
I have met (oops) lots of new cool people this semester.
Amanda, I haven't talked to you since you left! :( except through writing, but thats not the same.
Ten days til my birthday.
Tomorrow is Yolanda's birthday.
Time to go.
bye.

peasants = me gusta

I am learning to dance cumbia, which is VERY fun! I have had two "lessons" and I don't seem to be doing so bad, but I have a feeling I will only really be able to dance with Cal because I know his moves. Anyone else I think will throw me off.
School is going okay. I have a lot of busy work and a couple classes I dislike very much. And one class I more than hate - I loathe it! But I also have a couple classes I like. Theology for instance, I find to be very interesting because I have never studied theology before and never really thought about it much. I think since our church in Mexico was just started when we got there (my dad started it) the sermons and sunday school and all were very basic and didn't get into the deeper theology that we are getting into in class. So I never have talked about it before and never really thought about a lot of it. The professor for that class - Jason Lief - is pretty interesting too, which I think helps a great deal.
Me thinks this weekend is going to be pretty busy. Tomorrow I have class from 8 to 9 and from 11 to 3. But then I have the afternoon off (to write a theology paper). Saturday night I am working at the Humble Bean (which is going great by the way) from 8pm to midnight. And Sunday I work at Hope Haven from 3pm to 7am on Monday. busy.
Today I babysat Ruben Henderson. He went to sleep right away though, but I watched the rest of his video which was of some lady and a guy singing kids songs, but in Nederlands. :) Dutch class is getting harder and harder, but also more and more interesting. I don't know what I'm really going to do with all this dutch when I am done with NSPICE though. Will I keep it up and keep taking classes? or will I just ditch it? who knows.
I bought the Peasants' cd, but it won't let me rip it onto my computer so I have to just listen to it when I'm in my room because I cannot take my disc drive with me... :( oh well. It is good though. I enjoyed the CD very much!
So there you are, Amanda. That is whats been up with me lately. sort of. Hoy recibi el postal que me mandaste. Danke! Me estaba sintiendo un poco frustrada con lo busy que estoy, pero me dio gusto escuchar de ti! Te extraño mucho!
good night. goedenavond. (look at me being all smart and multilingual.)

p.s. 21 days till my birthday. :)

share a bit of moon with me

I went to sioux falls yesterday and bought new violin strings. I hope they are nice because they were a little costoso.
I also bought Beethoven's Opus 27 Nr. 2 - Moonlight Sonata - for piano. Appears it will be a challange for me, but I love it so much! It's a beautiful piece.
I also bought some nice shorts. They are supposed to be capri but I found them in the petit section so they fit like my kinda shorts. I like them.
I slept in my hammock again last night! Outside. Then it rained, but I didn't get wet because I was under a porch. I missed my hammock. For the first few weeks after we left Mexico and I started sleeping on a bed I got headaches and neckaches and backaches because I wasn't used to it. Hammocks, if you know how to sleep in them, can sort of form to your body and support your head, even without a pillow and are extremely comfortable. I can even sleep on my stomach in them without having to turn my head sideways to breathe. I just wake up in the morning with lines on my nose... :)
I have to go study Nederlands now and write a theology response for monday because tomorrow I work from 3pm to 7:30am on monday. yuck, but so it will be every other Sunday for me.

tomorrow comes

First day of classes today. And I made a goof. Like a freshmen... I have theology 101 (cuz I haven't taken it yet) at 2pm and choral at 1pm. But today we didn't have choral and like an idiot I went straight to theology.. and the same professor teaches the same class in the same room at 1pm. So I sat down and after a few minutes, but before he started talking, I realized I was in the wrong section. So, like the dumbass I am, I just blurted it out and told the prof I might as well just sit there for the hour and after today I'll go at the regular time. And that's just what I did, but I feel kind of stupid about it, though it wasn't a big deal.
I have two gen eds and a basic HPER major course, so three of my five classes consist mostly of underclassmen. It's weird how that makes me feel more confident; how I can just speak my mind and not be afraid of sounding stupid. Not that I won't sound stupid, but I'm not as afraid of it.
I'm getting a bit more comfortable with the Humble Bean too. I went there today and I'm going again today and we're finally, hopefully, getting our schedules figured out so I will know when I'm working and stuff.

I think this will be a good year. :)

This is a long drive for someone with no music

Sometimes I forget how nice a longish drive alone can be. I went to Omaha Friday night to pick up some Dordt freshmen and driving alone with my foot out the window, singing along to my music was refreshing. I should do it more often. but wait. I don't have a car.

Some highlights of the past couple days:
I slept in my hammock outside last night and it was wonderful!
Two of my roommates are here.
I just got back from hanging out with some friends at docs.

never thought twice

One more week of work and then school starts. There will still be work (I hope), but less of it and more of study.
I talked to one of my younger sisters today for at least an hour getting all the inside info on her new hook-up with a guy she's been hooking up with FOR THE PAST FOUR YEARS! Anyway, she's talking about going to Alberta to visit my dad's side of the family next summer and MAYBE staying all summer to work. I was thinking, "sweet, I was thinking of doing that myself and it would be awsome to room with Yoli and spend a summer with her and, God willing, her new boyfriend." I hope that works out, but it depends on her current job and if there are as many jobs available then in Calgary as there seem to be now, and on whether or not we could make as much money there in Canadian dollars as we could here in American. (Who knows, by then the Canadian dollar might be worth as much or more as the US dollar...) It was good to talk to her though. I miss her.
My brother's birthday is in 5 days, which means I need to get cracking on the CD mixes I'm making for him. And I need to figure something out I can send to my littlest sister who's birthday is also in 5 days.
I don't have to work until 4:30 today.
I need to memorize more scripture.
I'm reading The Silver Chair now.
I gotta go.
Peace.
and Love.
TO ALL.

I'll be gone like I said

As someone once said, times were good, but its time to move on now and look forward to this next year.

I am now officially a humble bean employee! I had my first day of training on friday? I think? Not yesterday friday, but the one before? It's fun. I believe it will be my favorite job yet. And its not as hard as I thought it might be.

Due to some schedule mishaps at work (Hope Haven), I ended up not having to work the overnight shift as I expected. Nice.

I went grocery shopping today. Bikes with baskets are amazing for grocery shopping!!

Today I made a delicious lupper and realised I had no one to share it with. And then I also realised I was going to go to family table in less than an hour with my clients. So at family table I ended up just getting a side dish and desert, but I paid more than half the clients did for their meals...

After supper we went to a blues concert in Rock Valley. It was good background music for my reading of the Silver Chair. Was that rude? Then we got cold and sat in the van to watch the fire works.

I found a banana bread recipe and I now have bread pans. I am just short a few ingrediants, so as soon as I get them I'll be a bread making machine! I used to bake banana bread a lot in Mexico to use up the rotten banana's in our house. Our baking soda came in litte two-table-spoon packages. I put chocolate chips in the bread. And I used more milk and less flour so it would be more moist and less cake-like.... who cares.

I haven't seen anyone who wasn't either a client or a coworker all day.

I'm going to bed.


P.S. I wrote this a couple days ago, but because I'm an idiot, I saved it as a draft instead of posting it... silly me.

Amanda is gone.

blame it on the wind

Camping this weekend was great. At least I thought so. It was a good change from all the work, but I can't say I got much sleep. We ended up not staying at the palisades because they were full, but where we did stay was just as good, in my opinion, except for the damn trains that came through all night and couldn't make up their mind which way they were going, or if they were going at all... However, the trains became a source of amusement mixed with apprehension when a boozed Ross almost hitched himself a ride to Sioux Center on one... :)
We did go to the Palisades on Saturday and swam in the river, which apparently was less cold and more dirty than it was in May. I also climbed the queen and king rocks and now my legs and shoulders are a bit sore.
I finished reading The Voyage of the "Dawn Treader". I think that's been my favorite of the Narnia books so far because it is a nice light break from the other almost suspenseful books. It also has a lot more little plots strung together by a bigger, but almost not as serious plot? I don't know how to describe it but theres a lot more little, but very imaginative stories in this book. And maybe its just me, but this book seemed more humorous to me. And I like humor.
After a nealry three hour nap I went to Amanda's for lunch today and got rained on so when I got there I was soaked. Then I got to talk to Josh for a few minutes today which made my day brighter. But then I missed a call from Justine which made me sad. :( Justine, I'm going to Amanda's sometime before she leaves and we are going to call you!
Played volleyball tonight on wet sand - four on four and we tied and left it at that. :)
I have about four loads of laundry to wash, but the coin machine ate my 5 bucks and gave me a quarter. So now I have wet, smokey, and sandy laundry mixed in a basket with my bedsheets and towel, sitting in my living room AND I'm five dollars poorer. Bugger.
So I went back home and was bored and scrolled through my phone and found a number of a friend in Houston who I haven't seen in six or seven years nor talked to beyond email for about as long... and I called her and talked to her and realized how much I miss her and how good it is to talk to old friends!

P.S. I've had a song, or part of it, stuck in my head all day and I want nothing more than to hear it, but I cannot remember who its by, only I have a vague feeling it is modest mouse, so I've been listening to every album I have of theirs in hopes of finding it, but I have five albums! I'm going to bed.

hey man, now you're really living

You know, one of the things I miss most about Mexico is physical touch. In Mexico most everybody is very touchy-feely. Even our way of greeting people there is not just walking into a room and saying hi, but greeting every individual with a kiss on the cheek. I miss that. I miss the hugs. I miss walking arm in arm with friends downtown. Or sprawling all over each other when we watched movies. Or just sharing a hammock with someone, which forces you to sit close. But mostly just the way people touch each other during regular conversations. When I was in fourth grade my family went on home service once and I saw one of my first grade friends in Michigan. I guess I must have been hanging on her and hugging her a lot because my mom called me aside and said "Carmela, you gotta give her more space. In the US people don't hug as much or get as close." And ever since then I've been maybe too aware of the personal space issue here. And it bothers me.

the bride then tripped and broke the vase

I just finished reading The Horse and His Boy of the Chronicles of Narnia. I am reading it for the first time and in chronological order, because I like things in chronological order. So far I like the books. I had seen The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe cartoon and then the new movie and now I've finally taken on the books. Funny thing is, popular as the series is, I've never heard ANYTHING about them, except the wardrobe one I saw.
Anyway, another bunch of books I want to read in chronological order are the books of the Bible. But at the moment I'm just trying to read it cover to cover.
My ride's here. Bye.

vamos a la cama, que hay que descansar.

I shadowed a physical therapist again today and he and a client started talking about the war. And the PT said something to the effect that the nations the US is at war with at the moment kind of had the war coming because of all the evil of the people of those nations. Then he mentioned something about the way they torture people by sticking them in hot tar and the like, which is terrible, but all I could think was what made him so certain that the US is any better? What makes him think America does not have a serious ass kicking coming to it? How dare he make that kind of judgment on any nation and have the nerve to say Iraq or Iran or any country we're at war with had it coming!
But then I was also extremely tired and perhaps I misunderstood what he was saying? I hope?

So Becca came. We had fun. She was only here for three days and two nights though. She went with Amanda and I and Matt B. and Joe to Cal's to use his jaccuzzi (?) bathtub. But you all heard about that on Amanda's blog, so I won't retell. We went to Sioux Falls on Tuesday and repierced her eyebrow. I have a surprise of my own, but I don't wanna spoil it so if you wanna know, just come see me. :) It was good to see Becca again. Sometimes I don't know how much I miss someone until I see them again. I love Becca.
I worked a couple double shifts again. So yesterday I didn't feel too bad taking off work to go boating again. :) I skiied again (my second time) and even managed to get out of the wake and back a few times. It felt much more comfortable this time. I think that was mostly due to the water being much more cooperative today. The lake was gorgeous! Smooth as butter. or icecream. or anything smooth really... It rained a bit too, so we almost quit, but there were boats in the doc and by the time it came around to our turn, we decided it was almost over anyway and just waited it out a bit longer. Then we had even more beautiful water and did some more skiing and some tubing. In comparison to any summer I've ever had, I think this one has had some of the best times, what with weddings, Eddie Izzard, trips to Alberta, seeing friends in Montana, boating, movies, jaccuzzi bubble baths, hottubs, Omaha, spending time with the beau, spending time with my sister, seeing my family, babysitting Taeda and Annica, smoking hooka, making friends, and many other adventures. The only thing I could ask for to improve my summer would be better work hours (as in more shifts, morning shifts, and not so much weekend shifts), but you can't have it all, I suppose.

The best week ever!

Wednesday:

• bought new shirts.
• watched Dane chop off his hair.
• cooked breakfast for Amanda and Dane.
• went to the zoo in Omaha with Dane, Amanda, and Matt K. for Dane's birthday.
• went to a Mexican restaurant in the old market.

Friday:

• had some beer and a shot of tequila.

Saturday:

• went boating in Spirit Lake for five hours.
• water skied for the first time in my life and did fairly well, I must say. I got up the first time and even stayed up for several minutes. Got up again later and stayed up until I was tired and let go. After my failed attempts at wake boarding last year, this skiing business made me feel much less hopeless. :)
• When I wasn't skiing, I was sitting in a lawn chair half in the water, smoking swisher sweets (or something).
• went tubing - the roughest tubing I've ever done.
• went out for supper.
• watched you, me, and dupree.

Sunday:

• woke up sore!
• did respite in the morning with Amanda for two autistic boys - took them for a walk.
• went to Dane's parents for a great lunch and even better desert.
• went swimming with Dane and Matt K.
• took a two hour nap.
• played a little volleyball.
• smoked a sheesha-pipe.
• talked till midnight with some friends.
• went for a walk with my summer roommie.

up next...

Monday:

• going to Omaha to drop off Janelle. Maybe. If I can find her.
• Becca McPherson is coming to visit!!!

I love my life.

P.S.

Second to last world cup game is today - playing for third place is Germany and Portugal.

Played some more violin yesterday. The more I play the more I like it. (maybe because it sounds better with practice...)
Dane got up early on his day off to make me breakfast! Delicious! Much appreciated!! :)
Only half the waiver guys are here right now which makes my job that much easier. and quieter.
This afternoon I get to go to Okaboji to watch a play and eat dinner. For free! Sometimes I love my job.
My dad almost baught me a car. Weird. And even weirder is I talked him out of it. (WHY!!!) I told him I don't really need one until senior year.
I still don't know what to do for christmas next year. Go to Mexico with my family? Go to Michigan? Alberta? Ontario? What to do. What to do. Obviously Mexico would be my first choice but I'm not sure I can afford it. But I AM NOT STAYING IN IOWA!

time to go.

oh Lord haste the day when my faith shall be sight

I should be catching sleep right now. but I'm not.
I just watched Pirates of the Carribean - Dead man's chest. its weird. really funny though.
Yesterday (or now more like the day before yesterday) I had the most relaxing day yet this summer. Then this morning (yesterday..) I spent of good share of my time getting my violin back in shape. Cal helped me tune it because I'm still no good at that, and then he played harmonies on his violin while I played the melodies of some great hymns. It sounded beautiful! well, some times. I like violins. and I like hymns sometimes. and I love playing music. and even more, I love playing music with other people. It's fun.
Okay. bed time. I have the most insane weekend coming up - six shifts in a row. forty four nearly straight hours of work - just a three hour break in between. At least I get to sleep for six hours each night.
Good night.

God, who'd wanna be such an asshole.

So Mexico lost, but not without a good fight. They went into overtime, but then Argentina apparantly scored a sweet goal that I didn't get to see because I had to work... but I kept getting little texts from Cal updating me on the game. Work ended up consisting of taking everyone to the festival thing in Orange City. woot woot. It wasn't ALL bad. There was one cool act by a family where they spun basketballs doing tricks with them spinning, or juggled them back and forth with each other or alone or on unicycles that were at least nine feet tall! no joke.

Did I mention I'm observing physical therapists (PT's) this month? Well, I am and there's one thing I've learned. I never want to be one of those health care providers that baby talks the patients and just does stuff without explaining what they are doing and what its for. One of the PT's I'm following, and the nurses at the hospital too, always talks to the patients (especially the old ones) in a really high happy voice all the time (that she doesn't use with her coworkers) and it pisses me off! It's disgusting.

yo traigo el fuego

Mexico lost against Portugal, but they made it to the round of 16 because Iran and Angola tied, so Mexico still had more points... Anyway, now Mexico is playing Argentina! tough team. they scored within the first 5 minutes, but five minutes later, Argentina just scored off a corner kick. Corner kicks scare me. It's easier to score off them. Sometimes.
anyway, this is gonna be a good game (I hope) so I'm finished blogging for now.
later.

el gato boladoooooooor.

mexico just tied with angola. how dare they. they played horribly. they weren't even trying. its like they win one game and get cocky and lose their concentration and play horribly after that. and I PAINTED MY FACE FOR THAT!! ARRRRGGG!! and I LEFT THE PT CLINIC EARLY FOR THAT!!
then amanda and matt and I went to get tacos. yummy. and it rained! and i went out in the rain. and we bought our tacos in the rain. and I got the hiccups.
I gotta see Mexico play Portugal! GOTTA SEE IT! they better get their tiny little tooshes in gear though!

Oleee. ole, ole, ole. ole. ole. (with a mexican accent.)

MEXICO BEAT IRAN 3-1!!! Great game too! Full of excitement and great playing and fowls - lots of fowls - and one yellow card and a coach wearing a mysterious looking tie. I don't recognize most of the players anymore. My favorites are gone. Oh well. I'll just have to find new favorites. And when it was over, Amanda and I cruised down main street honking at everyone and yelling and singing and cheering and waving a flag out the window! no one else joined in our celebration, but we were reminiscing about Mexico and imagining how all world cup fans in Merida would be driving around Paseo Montejo doing the same thing at the same time as us, miles and miles away. Last world cup was our last summer in Merida. And we drove around with our friend Alonso or maybe Luis Alberto (I don't really remember which) and that was fun! come to think of it, maybe that wasn't even FIFA... maybe that was independence day? Either way, I miss stuff like that.
I hope Mexico kicks Portugal's behind. (and carmela smiles innocently.)

you got time

Yesterday I shadowed a physical therapist for a day. It was kind of fun! They use massages, ultrasounds, electricity and exercises as parts of therapy. It's really cool. and I found out that theres a such thing as travelling physical therapists. As in some companies hire therapists just to travel around and fill in temp positions for a couple months to a couple years, but not much longer than that. Sounds like the perfect job for me. I'd love to travel. I love working at different places. The idea of working the same job in the same place for more than 4 or 5 years kind of scares me. It would be great to get to just travel and get different experiences at different places.

On a different note, its freezing outside. Just thought I would state the obvious. And biking in this cold wind is AWFUL! I have rode, half walked my bike home from work today because I got tired of riding.

(I am titleless because the music I'm listening to now is lyricless.)

I got up at 8:30 this morning. The earliest yet this summer. I think. Someone decided to test building D's fire alarm at 8:30am. But for whatever reason, I thought it was a garbage truck, and in my groggy state, I remembered something about house sitting, and recycling, and June 6 and I decided the recycling for the house I'm sitting needed to be out on the 6th and THAT WAS TODAY!! Then I decided that, though I had probably missed it, maybe if I got over there quick, I could possibly catch the truck if it wasn't through there yet, so I jumped in the car and drove to the house and checked the notes from the home owners which told me recycling goes out on June 6 in the evening so they can pick it up on the 7th... ARRRRRRRRGGG!!! I coulda slept an extra couple hours! but now that I was up, I fed the fish, checked the mail, watered the cat and went back to my apartment, made french toast, and went to dollar general to check out their AWSOME 90% OFF SALE! only to find out just the toys and a few select items are actually on sale. But hey, when everything starts off around 1 or 5 dollars, who can complain? And where else, even on sale, could one find a cutting board, two knives, and scissors set for three dollars? (I hope no where else cuz otherwise I'll feel dumb about being so excited about my purchase.)

I believe in a thing called love

Canada was great. We left friday at midnight to get to Alberta Saturday evening. Saw my grandparents. Went to Banff for a day where I bought my first legal drink. I bought a whole pitcher, but the girl didn't even card me... Then Amanda, Dane, two of my cousins and I went to climb Sulfur Mountain. We tackled it full force, skipping out on the path and just climbing straight up. We got just over half way and then started taking the path, but by then the beer, the thin mountain air, and my being just plain out of shape got to me and I was feeling so light headed I went back down while the rest kept climbing. Except Dane, of course, who being the good boyfriend stayed with me. So that was kind of embarrassing...
I went horse-back-riding at my uncles farm. He put us to work with the cattle. None of us really knew what we were doing so we just looked like a bunch of stupid city kids riding around the feild spooking all the cows and scattering them all the wrong ways. :)
We went shopping around some nice places in Calgary too. It was kind of rainy that day though and I was wearing my flip flops. At some point we were crossing a street and there were cars all lined up.. and I slipped on a man-whole cover in front of all of them scrapping my knees and tearing wholes in both knees of my good jeans. At least now their "stylish"... Ah well, it was worth the laughs. If something stupid like that is going to happen, there at least better be people to see it to make it worth while. :)
I got to see my cousin and his pregnant wife. And I got to hear some of the music he recorded with his buddy.
I bought the best kind of Canadian honey from some family friends my dad used to do bee keeping with.
I also bought Bryers Oh Henry ice cream!! MMMMMmmm!!!
And on the way back we stopped at Alan's place and hung out with him and Jeff and some of their friends. We spent the night and made the rest of the trip the next day.
Immediately upon returning, it was back to work for Amanda and I.
Calgary is beautiful.
Montana is gorgeous too, and they have great beer, but there's hardly anyone there!

aswingin' I must go

good news - I don't have to work today.
bad news - I'm bored.
good news - I got to sleep in.
bad news - I sleep in every day so I actually have gotten too much sleep...
good news - I'm going to Alberta.
bad news - It's a 20+ hour drive.
good news - My mom recieved another tax return check for me.
bad news - I don't get it until I come back from Alberta.
good news - I get paid tomorrow.
bad news - I have to work tomorrow so we can't leave for Alberta till after 10pm.
good news - I'm of legal age in Alberta.
bad news - did I mention I'm bored?
good news - did I mention I'm going to Alberta?

roll the windows down and play the music loud

There are so many people I care a lot about, many of which are now graduated and I may never see again. And though goodbyes, of which I've had many, have never been my favorite, I'm still very greatful for goodbyes because it means there was a hello before it. Even though it hurts to watch many of you who mean so much to me leave, I thank God every time I remeber you. I thank God for blessign me with the opportunity to meet you and for the impact you have had on my life. I'm a different person because of you, in a good way. I just wish I had told you in person how much you mean to me because I can't just start listing names here. So this is kind of my tribute to all of you.
Thanks for being like older brothers and sisters to me. Thanks for creating a community of selfless givers. Thanks for the holloween parties, coffee hours, movie nights, dinners, brunches, and relaxing get-togethers often filled with music. Thanks for concerts. Thanks for introducing me to so many good musicians and bands I'd never even heard of. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and opinions and wisdom. Thanks for your honesty. Thanks for caring about the environment. Thanks for caring about the world. Thanks for showing me how great friendships can be!
I love you!

I hope this song will guide your heart

sometimes I love rainy days. today, the rain fits my mood - calm and quiet, though not dark and sad. its a good kind of rainy mood. anyway, the rain inspired me to make a rainy day music list. included in it is the garden state soundtrack. one of my favorites! When it rains I don't know whether I want to turn my music up and sing my heart out, or curl up in a comfy chair and silently read a book. But today I think I'll just turn up my music and try to start my last paper of the year.

dusty roads I walked

I'm pulling my third all-nighter in 6 nights. All due to papers. How awful. But I have no one to blame but myself. And of course the play. But regardless, I should have started my papers sooner. Doing interviews for a paper the afternoon before a paper is due is a bad idea.
I'm so sleep deprived I have been having a difficult time communicating. I keep getting brain farts, unable to remember the names of things or easy common words. Last week was absolutely terrible for homework. I'm beginning to think dead week was labelled as such because its so awful people threaten it. I wish it was dead. I wish I was in bed. I owe opperation joy kill three dollars.

oh saint marie.

My life as of late seems to have been consumed with papers, debates, assignments, plays, choirs, and general RA stuff.
The Somewhat True Tale of Robin Hood is playing tomorrow. If you like silly, childish, and cheesy shows you should come. It's only a dollar. You can go tomorrow or saturday. Friday is sold out.
But if you want something to do friday, you could go to the concert at 7pm. Many many choirs are singing! we're starting in the BJH and then moving to the gym where all the choirs will sing a few songs together! Crazy!
Also, monday night at 9 there's gonna be a huge kick-ass FIESTA at covenant hall! everyone's invited! There's gonna be snacks and eating contests and games and music. So come. if you want.

the calm is on the surface

I woke up this morning, and as I usually do when I first wake up, I tried to go through my mental checklist of what I have to do today. But I laid in bed for five minutes before I could even remember what day it was and what classes I had. It was scary! I need to get more sleep.

the storm on the tip of my tongue

Hip hop doesn't seem to be a big thing around here. In fact, I can't remember the last time I heard real hip hop. Like any genres of music you gotta sift through the shit to find the good shit, but there IS some good shit out there. Maybe its more rap that I like. I don't really know the difference between hip hop and rap. Either way, I have a lot of respect for people who can put words together in such a way that it not only gets their point across, but also uses clever play on words and has rhyme and rythm without sounding stupid. I've always loved rhymes. Plus, I like the agressive sound of it, or at least the confidence with which it is sung/said...

the day after yesterday. or the day before tomorrow?

I guess the ABC's get old after a while because no one seems to be reading my blog. or maybe my awsome poetry skills are too much for people to handle. ;) In all seriousness, though, I want to take a poetry class, but I can't because of class conflicts or being off-campus or something. I guess I'll just have to take shakespear instead. I like english classes, but I don't like writing papers. could be a problem... conflict of interests in the literal sense.

More later, but its lunch time now.

I'm hunting wabbits

spring is great
in the spring birds mate
summer is fun
in the summer there's sun

to welcome the seasons
I've listed some reasons
I like spring and summer
so enjoy.

Adventures
Basking in the sun
Chirping birds waking me up
Driving with the windows down
Easter
Flowers and fruits
Green things
Hop-scotch
Ice cream
Jobs
Kites
Lollipops
Motorcycles
Naps in the sun
Outdoor sports and activites
Picnics
Quacking of returning ducks and geese
Rain
Shorts and skirts
T-shirts
UV-radiation (tanning)
Vacations
Warmth
X-uberance of people (?)
Yard sales
Zoo trips

In loving memory of winter

there is a fly flying in my room. he makes me happy. he whispers in my ear at night. and tells me spring is here. I shall name him Franky. Franky has inspired me to write about spring. but first things first. I think a little goodbye to winter would be appropriate. as a parting gift, I have written up what I like about winter in my new alphabet style.

Good things in winter are

Ability to see breath
Bubble baths
Coffee and hot chocolate
Donuts with cars in parking lots
Earmuffs
Fireplaces
Goofy snowmen with butt cracks and vices
Hot tubs
Ice skating
Jolly fat men with white beards
Knitting in a cozy place
Long underwear
Mittens
Naked trees that sparkle when they get frosty
Oatmeal
Puffy coats
Quiet ambience
Rosy cheeks
Snow and all activities associated with it
Tuques
Unearthly beauty of clean, fluffy, freshly fallen snow
Vests
Winter olympics
X-mas
Year end and beginning
Zamboni's

What I miss about Mexico

Adal Ramones
Buses
Cenotes
Down town
El Chavo del Ocho
Friends
Good food ;)
Humor
Iguanas
Jewelry
Kanasin
Little independent stores and restaurants
Music
Night life
Orgullosamente Yucateco t-shirts
Paseo Montejo
Quintana Roo (where Cancun is)
Rain
Sunrises and sunsets
Traffic circles
Undies with ruffles
VW bugs
Walking everywhere
2X Lager commercials
Yucatan
Zoo

went to the porch to have a thought

Went to Jack and Jazz's wedding in Strawberry Point. That was by far the most fun I've ever had at a wedding. I went thrift store shopping and found some sweet cheap shirts. Had one of the biggest blonde moments of my life too... Amanda, Justine and I stayed the nights at a farm house way out on some back roads while the guys stayed at a hotel somewhere. So one night us girls drove Dane and Josh to their hotel and then we took Dane's car to our farm place. I drove. I drove all the way to the farm. I DROVE THE WHOLE FUCKING THIRTY MINUTE DRIVE TO THE FARM WITH THE PARK BREAK ON!! I felt awful, but Dane, being the great boy that he is, hid any anger he might have had and just laughed at me and made me feel better. thanks Dane!
Dane, Josh, Amanda, and I went snowboarding on tuesday in Mankato. My body hates me now. But snowboarding is now one of my favorite and most expensive things to do. I mostly stuck to the little hills... I tried some of the bigger little hills, which was fun, but decided it was best to master the easy hill and get more confident before trying the larger ones again.
I'm working a bit this break. I gotta get some money to pay off the rest of my semester. If I stop spending money from now on, I should do alright. :) (nervous laugher...)

things I want to do eventually at some point in time... in no particular order

- backpack in costa rica
- learn Italian
- live in Italy
- learn to cook food that tastes GOOD
- 60 hours of no sleep
- snowboard
- visit every continent
- learn the lyrics to songs I like and the ones I don't like
- see boston again
- ride a camel or an elephant or a buffalo
- be part of a mercy ship
- jump out of an airplane
- smoke pot
- learn to act (as in acting as in theater)
- become a poet
- be able to name all (or at least most) the countries of the world and know relatively where they are
- deep sea diving
- play bass or drums or both.. and actually learn to play a musical instrument well!

p.s. I like pastor Herm.

Today in church someone made a comment about being able to see God in even the smallest details of life. I've always considered myself to be fairly trusting. My parents have this increadible trust in God, which has been sort of contagious and I have picked up on some of it. I never worry about being fed or clothed or sheltered. But for some reason the first thing that popped into my head when that comment was made was "where the hell is God now when my family needs him!" and then instantly I was ashamed. Is that how I really feel? Have I only been suppressing the fears I have, using blind faith as a cover just to hold me over, while becoming angry and bitter inside that things haven't started getting better yet?

oh dicky.

(I know its not tuesday anymore, but whatever.)

60 minutes

I don't usually get up at 8, but today I did. I have an "interview" (not really, but we gotta dress like it) in Intro to Psych so I need extra time to get ready. Intro isn't till 10 though. Health psych is at 9. So I get ready. Then I see it's only 8:40 so I got some extra time. Why not check my email? So I do. and what do I see? an email from Christians telling me Health psych is cancelled and I could have slept another hour! SHIT. but I suppose I should be thankful that I actually got the email and didn't walk all the way to class. But now that I'm all dressed up, I can't go back to sleep. That would be useless anyhow. So I've got this hour to do whatever I want... physics, reading, learning a new language...

Highlights of the week

1. Watching the movie Saw on valentines day.

2. Trying on a million clothes at the costume shop to find a warm dress to wear out.

3. Finding nothing and wearing a sexy, red, knee-length dress out to dinner instead on the coldest night of the week.

4. Eating at the Intermission in Rock Rapids.

5. Getting Walhof to pay for my meal. :)

6. Hanging out with my, uh, special friend (?)

7. Becca coming for the weekend.

8. Comedy League

9. Hanging out with my peoples at my sister's house.

10. I'm not telling what ten is... :)

11. Ice skating

12. Going to Hendersons for dinner and being surrounded by intelligent people I've come to care about a great deal!

13. Wearing PJ's to coffee hour.

this is the good life

I just found out that a good friend of mine from Mexico died a month ago in a car accident. Hearing that gave me the weirdest feeling. At first it was like words with no meaning. Like, "oh, Papas died. I should be sad right now." But I feel so distant from it all, so removed that it doesn't feel real. Then I felt worse for not feeling anything than I felt about his passing. This is supposed to be sad, so why am I not crying? Then I did cry, and I'm not sure if it was from the thought of never seeing him again, or the fact that he more than likely died without knowing God, or that the memories the whole thing brought up made me miss Mexico all over again, or if I was just angry that I didn't know sooner, or maybe just struck by the harsh reality that we ARE so disconnected from so many people I care about, which is part of the reason I didn't find out sooner. I just want to go back to Mexico. And I want everyone to be there. And I want things to be like they were. I want to be in my friends' lives again.
and I don't want to lose the people I care about now. How many more times do I have to say goodbye?

Hi you.

This is nice. I have a blog. and I can write what I want right now cuz no one knows about it! :)